I don't like when people keep their babies in car seats like it's a portable bed. I see people have the baby in the car seat in the shopping cart, in the doctors office, at parties, in the weirdest strangest places.
I did it before. Before I knew any better. But, not that often. Not to places I see people having their kids in car seats now. When I have my next baby, I hope to always have him be close to me or Dad in a sling.
I think babies need to be held more. From my experience with Luke, they are always happier in arms, close with his mother. Close to where he was the nine months before. The soothing sound of my heart beat and the warm touch of my skin.
What makes it so difficult to put a baby in a sling when you arrive at a store? And, if you are leaving your baby in a car seat and when they start to fuss or cry, why do you do everything you can to keep them in that car seat. Just take them out and hold your baby! (ok ok, I know sometimes if they are napping, it's hard to take them out and I'm sure it's ok... but I'm talking about the people who over do it.)
I feel sad when babies are lugged around in the car seat. I wonder what it's like to be nuzzled against plastic instead of your Mommy.
4 comments:
I hate this too! I tried so hard to never have my daughter in her car seat unless she fell asleep on the drive. I'm just so confused as to why anyone would rather carry around a huge awkward 20+ lb carrier instead of holding their 15 lb baby snuggled up next to them? My daughter is 14 months now and I miss getting to carry her in the wrap. I still use a sling, but she usually just wants to get out and walk. which is fun too. :)
i wore my girl and it was the most beautiful thing. i know that for us it worked. for me and for her.
but it's not for everyone. i don't judge a parent fot having their child in a stroller, pram, car seat, because in all honesty, i can't claim to know their personal story.
does mama have a bad back, PND, has had the week from hell? does baby prefer a little space around his body? do the parents have no idea of another option (like you with your first)? do they have pressure from family? has mama got a velcro baby who will not give her 2 mins of space and this is mama's only time to find some sanity?
i just can't know.
it's like once at the library my girl was having her formula milk and the look i got from a nearby mother was priceless. she looked at me like i was abusing my child. she had no idea of my story. of my emotional pain, of my feelings of failure, of my grief at the loss of BFing...
just sayin', go easy on such mamas. :)
You're right Mon. I mostly just feel sad and want the baby to be held. I guess it's just that, I get sad when the baby cries and isn't able to be held. I know it's mostly because everyone does the car seat thing, so everyone else does it cuz they see it.
I know, I probably shouldn't use one senario that I saw once in real life a story on my blog. Sometimes I just have to get it out when I see a baby in need of some snuggling.
I imagine all kinds of reasons that parents leave their babies in car seats. Like, they have other little ones they need to care for, or they want the baby to sleep in it so they can have their arms free (they probably don't know the benefits of slings!), maybe they have the notion that they will spoil their baby from holding it too much. They probably don't know that holding their baby is so much better for it.
Leaving them in the car seat all the time can cause them to get a flat head, and it may lower their blood oxygen levels. People don't realize this. Babies are meant to be held. But people do what they see. Phillip wanted to carry Michael in the car seat, and I couldn't understand why he'd rather lug around the extra (and awkward!) weight of the car seat, than hold his baby close to him. He brought him into church in the car seat once, and I immediately took him out and held him the entire time. And then people were surprised at how quiet he was. Huh. I never understood the carriers at church, when the parents are just going to be sitting there anyway...why not cuddle the child while they have their hands free?
I know some parents can't hold their babies all the time, but most could do more. I wish everyone knew how beneficial it is. How good it is for the baby's health and how it can deepen your bond with your child. It just goes to show that culture can so easily override our intuition.
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