Friday, December 31, 2010


This post is mostly for me, so I can remember for my next baby. 

Luke is telling me that he has to poop now, before he goes.  He did it for the first time when we went to my parents for Christmas.  He told me very clearly 'poop'.  There was another time before that, right before we left, he pooped a little in his pants and then told me poop and went the rest in the toilet.

He's been on and off either telling me right when he's going, or right before.  I think that's pretty awesome and a huge step. Now, if he'd just tell me right before he peed....

Monday, December 13, 2010

Midwife appointment #2

I LOVE my midwife.  We just recently moved but she still does births in the new town I live in.  AND she CAME to MY HOUSE for the check up.  Now I don't have to drive 40 minutes every time I have an appointment.  It's pretty convenient too because she lives closer to me than to her office so on Fridays she makes home visits.
She did a heartbeat check.  Everything seemed to be going fine.  She also checked for twins.  I had had a dream I was having twins one night and also have been feeling the baby move around earlier than last time.  So I have been worried that I've been having twins.  (worried might be the wrong word, but it would be quite a job to take care of two newborns)  Anyway, I'm not, she said that it felt like one baby in there.  Whew. 

She took some blood last time and this time recommended me to take some extra iron and calcium.  I can already tell the difference with the iron. I am feeling much more energetic than I have been.  I just feel almost normal now!  Wow, what a difference.

Anyway, I just love her.  She just makes me feel so confident about the homebirth.  I just know that this is the right choice for me because it feels right.  I am so excited to labor at home, I know that this is the type of birth I want. 
I will have an ultra sound sometime in the next couple of weeks, hopefully before Christmas, to have everything else checked and to see if we can find out if it's a boy or girl.  I'm guessing boy and I hope it's a boy, though, we wouldn't be disappointed with a girl either.

As far as nursing goes, I'm still making milk.  I'm not sure how much... but it still squirts out pretty good.  And sometimes Luke eats a lot of regular food and sometimes he doesn't so I really can't tell if my supply is down yet.  But it's enough right now and I'm happy about that.  Especially since Luke has a cold this week.

That's pretty much it for now.  We moved into our new house this last weekend and I'm loving it so far.  Can't wait to get even more settled!

Monday, December 6, 2010

EC update

I just realized today that it has been a long time since I've updated about Luke's EC journey.  

He is now 18 months.  We almost always have him cloth training pants... which are pretty much like underwear with an extra absorbent pad in the center.  The pee still leaks out a little down the legs and since they are cloth, they wet the pants too (if he's wearing pants- we don't wear them all the time at home).   So when we go out, I bring an extra pair of pants and underwear.

I have to say that he hardly has accidents.  It seems more like the accidents are more when he is trying to tell me that he has to go, but I am not paying attention.  Or when we drive along ways, he gets fussy and I realize when I take him out that he was mad because he had to pee. 

Lately he has been wetting one diaper at night.  He is teething and therefore nursing more hence the wet diaper.  It usually happens when he wakes up and squirms a little bit and then nurses.  I usually check his diaper if he's been a little restless and if it's wet we change it right away.  I hate the thought of him sitting in a wet cloth diaper all night.
Before the teething, he would usually not wet all night.  I think his bladder is getting bigger now, finally.

As far as poop goes, we either catch them while he's peeing or we can see that he has to go and we take him.  I am so proud that he's now able to sit on the little potty until he's done pooping.  He used to want us to hold him over the potty.  And I can ask him, 'are you done?', and he'll either shake his head and say 'no' because he still has to go.  Or he'll stand up and say 'done'.  It's nice to not have to break my back holding him over the potty. 

Moving forward, I still would like him to tell me that he has to go.  He has done so on occasion, but I think it's when he really has to go.  Usually we just ask him if he has to go and his answer is almost always 'no' even if he does.  So I guess I should see if he could take the initiative more.  I'd also like to see if he would be more excited if he could stand on a stool by the potty and pee, but that's more of a job for dad :)

Even if he doesn't graduate or 'potty train' for a while, I have to say that EC is definitely worth it.  There's lots of misses in the beginning and there's different phases and potty strikes but I love it.  I can't wait to do it with my next child.  It has been such a great communication tool and a learning experience for both of us. 
I'm going to be bold and say, babies are so smart and they don't deserve to be left in poopy or wet diapers.  I truly believe that all babies signal potty signs to their parents, we just sometimes forget the way they communicate... at least I forget sometimes.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010


I went to the tot time at our Library in our new town.  I really liked it and so did Luke.  There were about 20 kids there.  The woman in charge was really bubbly and friendly.  So I think we'll go back.  I was impressed with the amount of board books they had for kids too.  Way more than my old library, well, they might have less, but they had more available to check out.

While they were reading and singing songs I looked hopefully looked around trying to spot other 'crunchy' Moms.  LOL.  I don't think that's something you can spot.  I didn't really go out of the way to to try to meet anyone.  I don't know if that sounds rude but I wasn't really in the mood today to chit chat.  But I overheard a lot of the conversations of moms afterwards and they all seemed like very nice people.  Maybe I can talk to someone next time.  I'd be nice to find some moms around to hang out with.  But I already have two friends with kids Luke's age from college that live close by.  So how many more do I need?  Plus, I'm still in denial about living so far away from my old neighbor and favorite mom friend, Lisa_C.  I guess I just need to drive up to Portland to hang out.

Well that's all for now.  Trying to take a nap now.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Moving and Pregnancy

We just moved to the town where my husband works. It's more of a town where as before, it was more the suburb of the city. I miss where we used to live mostly because I miss our house. Right now we're in an apartment, which isn't so bad, but if we were going to be here longer I would have to do something about the chaos. We're currently in the process of closing on another house but it will be a couple more weeks until we will move again. I'm excited though that it will be before Christmas!!
Luke handled the move great. He loves new places. I asked him if he liked his new house and he said 'uh huh'!  Well, and he sleeps with us so there's really no room transition or anything that I hear about when people move with kids. 

I am currently 15 weeks pregnant and mostly over all morning sickness. There still are days that I feel nauseous but it's just from being tired. And it's pretty easy to get tired with a cute 18 month old running around!! 
Nursing is still going well. I had a thrush spell but I think it's mostly gone, knock on wood. And it still seems like I still have plenty of milk, and I'm really happy for that. 
I saw my midwife for my first official appointment around 12 weeks. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat... Music to our ears. And I really love my midwife!  She does home births only.  I'm really excited to do a home birth, I think it will be a lot more relaxing than the hospital and I'm really happy about it. Though we still have yet to tell some of our family, we'll see how that goes. 

Things are going pretty well. I'm really looking forward to thanksgiving and eating lots of yummy food. Though, I am sad about missing holiday beer. It's my favorite. 
I hope to update more now. I'm really going to try. 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

What cosleeping is like for me.

When I was pregnant with Luke I never thought in my wildest dreams would I ever have my child sleep with me and my husband.  I thought things like 'what a bad habit' or 'they'll never grow out of it'.  And then I thought my husband and I would never get alone time or our bed back.

When we brought Luke home, we had him in a crib in the other bedroom.  My husband would go get him each time he needed to nurse.  Luke was always a fairly good sleeper so it wasn't often.  He was far from a colicky baby.  But each night I would worry about him being all alone and I was loosing sleep myself.  So we decided it would be easier to move the crib into our room next to our bed as a co-sleeper.  It was great.  I could check on him and I could see him breathe and move around.  Each morning around 4 or 5am Luke would wake to nurse.  I would pull him in bed with me, and being exhausted, he just slept with us because we were too lazy to get up and put him back in and risk waking him up.  Then as time went on, we just let him sleep after the 2am nursing, then one night I think we just fell asleep nursing at bed time.  And by that time he was older, about 4 months, and really strong so we weren't worried about blankets or the cat getting at him.  

That was it, he slept with us.  Then the crib ended up being a piece of furniture in the way and the cat ended up sleeping in it.  Finally we got tired of it taking up space and by then we knew we were a co-sleeping family. 

Now, I can't imagine it any other way.   Luke is now 16 months and I couldn't imagine sleeping with out him.  Neither could my husband.  In the other room, he'd be so far away.  If he wanted to nurse, it'd be such a long walk in there.  Not to mention all the benefits there are to co-sleeping, why would we want it any other way? 

I love the extra cuddles.  I love being there when he wakes up.  He's so cute when he wakes up, sometimes he's dreaming and he says 'bus' (or something else) right as he's waking up.  One time the day after we saw my friend Usa, he said 'Usa' right as he was waking up.  Then he rolls over and has a big smile on his face because he knows his Mama is right next to him.  And he's even more excited when he sees that it's the weekend and Dad is right next to him too.  Those are the moments I never want to miss.  They are the sweetest things.

Our next baby won't even be in a room by themselves.  They'll be cuddled right next to us.  I wouldn't want it any other way.

Monday, October 18, 2010

It's been a while

Boy, Oh, Boy has it been a while.  I haven't blogged in a while now.  I've been trying to take it easy.  I haven't felt good for a while now, since 6 weeks.  Then I got the stomach flu(or food poisoning), which put me out for a whole week.  My in-laws came over every day that week to help me and to play with Luke.
On top of all of that, we sold our house.  They just finished the inspection and if all goes well we should be moving in the middle of Nov!  I'm just so excited to have my husband home for two hours extra, instead of him commuting.
I'm just plain tired.  I am 10 weeks pregnant as of today so I'm hoping that in just a couple of weeks after I get out of this miserable first trimester I should be feeling better.
Fortunately, breastfeeding is still going well.  We had a little thrush and sore nipples but treated it with some grapefruit seed extract and it seemed to go away.  I'm still making plenty of milk and that makes Luke and me very happy.
Anyway, just a quick update while I had a spare minute.  I just have been trying to nap when Luke naps and that doesn't give me very much blogging time.  Hopefully as I feel better I'll have more spare moments!

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Quick post about laundry soap.

Since Luke has been born and we've been washing diapers I've been trying to use natural laundry soap. Just because it's gentle and well, natural. I've used several different brands. Some not so good, others better. Well, this last week I've been so ill, more on that in another post, my mother in law graciously offered to take our laundry home after my parents in law had been at my house taking care of me and Luke. She brought them back the next day and, oh boy, that is what laundry us supposed to smell like. It smelled fantastic and snuggly and just so good. I think I might consider using what she does. I mean the difference between our laundry and hers was SO much different, so much better. I could just curl up in all my clean towels and bask in the sweet smell of them.
Anyway- more pregnancy update to come. Stay tuned

Monday, September 20, 2010

6 weeks

I feel sick. Yep, it's started, the nausea. The good news is that I'm not throwing up and last time it only lasted until about weeks 12. So the bad news, I still have 6 more weeks like this :(. It could be cousin was so sick during her pregnancy she had to take something to not throw up. I cant believe she went through that.
I'm sipping on coffee right now because I think I have a caffiene headache from yesterday because coffee made me feel sick. But today it seems to be helping me feel better and i also have lavender rubbed on my feet which also seems to be helping. I found this website that has some natural remedies for pregnancy related things and I'm going to try all of the nausea ones today lol.
I've also noticed my breasts getting tender too. It doesn't hurt very bad when Luke nurses and it's really not too big of deal which is good, thankfully. We'll see how it goes.
My back is better! The acupuncture really did wonders and all the rest I had this weekend helped too. My husband did everything for me this weekend. I basically just laid around. And I'm almost finished watching The Office in its entirety again. It's still just as funny.
There were a few good things that happened when i hurt my back. One of them was that I left Luke with my mother in law while I went to urgent care. It was his first time being away from both of us. And he didn't care in the slightest! Even though it was sad for me, its good to know that he's fine. So far, I know he'd be just fine with my MIL because he loves her and my best friend Usa, who he's obsessed with.
Luke also spend a lot of time with Ben this weekend running errands and going places. All of which he was completely fine doing and sometimes i almost think he does better with my husband because there is no option of nursing all the time.
Anyway, my husband is back at work today... So it'll be my first full day taking care of Luke since I hurt myself and started to feel sick. I hope it goes ok. I'm thinking about getting some signing time movies at the library to watch in case i feel like just laying on the couch. Only 6 more weeks,6 more weeks.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Wordless Wednesday - Luke's Walking Cane


Lower back pain- Relaxin

This hormone relaxin came early for me again this pregnancy.  I was moving a bed into the spare room yesterday... yeah I know I probably shouldn't have done it, my husband told me not too... i knew I shouldn't have.  But we had people coming to look at the house.  I bent over pushing the box springs on the bed frame and OUCH!  A very bad pain went around my pelvis.  OH my gosh did it hurt.  Ben was on his way home but not there yet.  Thank goodness he was almost home.  I screamed and Luke came running looking at me like I was going to die.  I kept it together trying my hardest not to hysterically cry.  I did everything I could to walk into my bed.  I got there and laid down, Luke followed and we watched videos on my iPhone while I was painfully waiting for Ben to come home.
I went to the urgent care later on in the evening... but of course, breastfeeding and pregnant, I can't really take much of anything.  I can take Tylenol.  That does nothing.   But I did get the supportive back thing because it seems that my pelvis is already relaxing and needs support.  Ben is home with me today and I'm just laying around watching Season 3 of The Office, again.
Oh boy, this might be a long pregnancy.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

News and thoughts with fears

I'm 5 weeks and two days pregnant, according to my iPhone pregnancy app. I'm excited. Though i always feel like it's hard to get as excited as the people i tell. I just can't get really excited over and over with out it being fake.
I mean, i am excited. I wanted to have kids close in age. I always wished i had a brother or sister. But there are so many things I'm concerned about.
My main concern is breastfeeding Luke. I wanted to nurse him until he naturally weans. I mean, i know i can nurse through pregnancy and beyond but i am worried it won't work out. There's always the change in milk, the decreased amount of milk, etc etc. My son is a comfort nurser, and my husband re-assures me that he needs to nurse and would probably nurse even if there was no milk at all. But I still want all the benefits if nursing for him.
Which leads me to my next concern and idea- I've never left Luke somewhere much less over night, he woud be fine for a litte bit at a friends or family but a hospital birth is out of the question since he still wakes up to nurse in the night and nurses to sleep most nights. And I really don't want to push that until I know he's ready. (I know some will think that is crazy but it's how we parent). For this reason and for my always wanting to have a home birth, I am going down that road, which is probably also just as popular as tandem nursing lol.
Anyway, I suppose most of my blog posts from here will be about this. I couldn't remember a thing from my pregnancy with Luke so I'm hoping to record more about it this time.
So far I'm feeling pretty good. I am seeing spots in my eyes sometimes, like an ocular migraine with out the headache. My. Midwife says it's the blood flowing other places that my head. I'm wondering if its lack of caffiene. (still driking some coffee but trying to cut back. Or that i need to drink and eat more to support pregnancy AND nursing. Either way, it's been a few days since i've seen spots! My lower back hurt a lot yesterday. But other Than those observations everything is going well. Even nursing is going ok, no sore breasts yet, even though I'm parinoid in wondering if my milk tastes different yet, so far so good.
I look forward to seeing how everything plays out. Prayers are greatly appreciated for baby and Luke and for me, and i suppose my loving husband who is just so kind in taking over more chores and things so i can rest, even though i don't feel like i need to yet.
Anyway, I'll write more about the home birth and my midwife later. Time for my limited amount of coffee... now!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Wordless Wednesday - Luke In Hawaii!

And now after being on a sunny warm island for a week, it's back to the northwest's fall gloomy weather.  Oh boy do I miss summer.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

15 Months (should have been posted Monday, but, hey, i was busy)

Oh my dear sweet Luke,

You have changed so much in the last month.  You are running and pretty fast.  You like to chase Pickle around the house.  You like to run after me or have me run after you. 

You are saying so many words now and signing them too.  I'm am amazed at all the things you understand now.  You see birds and say 'bird' and sign it, same with dog, hat, outside, and many more.  You just recently started saying 'Usa', my friend that used to live with us.  It sounds like 'Awwsa'.  One morning after hanging out with her the day before, you said 'Awwsa' when you were waking up in hopes that she would be there.

Playing with Usa   

At night before you go to bed you and Daddy watch 'dees' (videos) on youtube.  You love this pirate one

'Dat' (Dad) is basically your best friend.  If he tries to run to the store or anything while he's home, you demand that you go with him.  Even if it means leaving Mama behind.
You still love cleaning.  I hope you never stop loving it.  It's such a novelty right now.  You can operate the vacuum by yourself, you like to wipe down tables, even do the 'dish' (dishes). 

Vacuuming at Usa's
Wiping down the table after dinner. (Don't worry, it's water and vinegar in an old bottle)  

We've also enjoyed some TCBY experiences too.  You like the frozen yogurt more and more each time.  I don't know if that's a good thing or not, but it's cute when you lick the cone and you hardly share anymore.

All the sudden you felt like eating a lot of food one week.  You ate eggs for breakfast which I never thought you liked.  And you had a lot of a bunch of other stuff.  I think you went on a growth spurt.  You also love eating butter still along with coconut oil and bacon.  Maybe you're craving more fat?  You don't like chocolate but like to hold it hostage from me.  You keep it in your little hand tempting me and then finally after awhile you'll let go.
So much has changed this month as you begin to start looking like a toddler and less like a baby.  I miss you as a baby but these times right now are the best ever.  You're so fun to hang out with.  I love being your mom and I love you so much.

Wordless Wednesday- Luke Loves Pasta

For more pictures on this Wordless Wednesday, visit Hobo Mama.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Self Portrait: Shadows

Think, I love me just the way I am

Elements of Self at Shakti Mama
I don't have anything special to say this time.  But I did have fun taking the shadow pics...

This one is me and my sweet baby in our house.  I used the lights inside to take these and have a little fun.  Can you see Luke's curlies in the back of his head?

 This is me drinking a glass of wine (that I actually only had one drink of because by the time I got to the rest of it I didn't feel like it) and I usually have beer but we were out...

 This is me kissing my husband :D  awww so sweet.

This is me, outside at these food cart things by my friend Usa's house.  I think her head is the one that is lower.  It looks like I'm wearing a dress, but in fact, it's basketball shorts.

This is our shadows.  Me and my little nursling. 

Friday, August 20, 2010

Relaxing and doing nothing

Yeah, I wish I was relaxing and doing nothing.  Unfortunately that's not the case.  I've been busy lately.  But I always wonder to myself, am I capable of doing nothing?

I've been reading the book Eat, Pray, Love and the woman is on a journey for a year.  Part of the year she is spending in Italy for pleasure.  Just to relax and enjoy herself.  She talks about how she has a hard time just doing nothing.  She always has to have something to accomplish or do.  She also talks about how that is an American culture thing.

I am just like that.  Sometimes I measure days in 'how much I got done'.  Sometimes I think the day is worthless unless I accomplished certain things.  I know as a stay at home mom, I often hear of people saying, 'I can't wait till they go to sleep so I can get something done'.  I say it too, maybe I can get something done when Luke naps.  Or when my husband gets home maybe I can finally do something.  But I hate that.  Why am I always trying to do something.  When my son naps, why can't I just feel like napping, resting, reading or praying is 'accomplishing something'.

I even noticed this when I was working as an electrical engineer at my job.  People work lots of hours, try to do lots of things, just to show that they are good at what they do.  Its the American Way to always want to do more, get more done, be busy.  And that is how we see people, those who can do so many things and many things at once are better employees.

Of course, there are times when you have to do get something done or your house will explode with messiness.  But maybe getting things done shouldn't be the measurement of greatness of the day.  When will playing with a ball outside or laying down on a bed and staring at the wall equal millions of house chores and tasks?

I hope I can take some advice from the book and stop having the idea that life is measure upon getting things done.  Take some time today to just enjoy life.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Car Seats

I don't like when people keep their babies in car seats like it's a portable bed. I see people have the baby in the car seat in the shopping cart, in the doctors office, at parties, in the weirdest strangest places.

I did it before. Before I knew any better.  But, not that often.  Not to places I see people having their kids in car seats now.  When I have my next baby,  I hope to always have him be close to me or Dad in a sling.

I think babies need to be held more.  From my experience with Luke, they are always happier in arms, close with his mother.  Close to where he was the nine months before.  The soothing sound of my heart beat and the warm touch of my skin.

What makes it so difficult to put a baby in a sling when you arrive at a store?  And, if you are leaving your baby in a car seat and when they start to fuss or cry, why do you do everything you can to keep them in that car seat.  Just take them out and hold your baby!  (ok ok, I know sometimes if they are napping, it's hard to take them out and I'm sure it's ok... but I'm talking about the people who over do it.)

I feel sad when babies are lugged around in the car seat.  I wonder what it's like to be nuzzled against plastic instead of your Mommy.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Praise and Manipulation... again

I wrote about this before but I wanted to touch on it again.

I hate praise.  But I think I understand it a little better.  I don't hate praise so much as I hate manipulation.  There's a difference, here it is.

Luke puts a dish away in the dish washer after I asked him by saying 'lets put our breakfast plates in the dishwasher'.  He does it.  I say 'thank you for putting your dish away'.

That is praise.  Everyone deserves it.

I say to my husband after dinner when he ever so kindly cleans up the kitchen while I nurse Luke to sleep... 'thanks for cleaning up the rest of the dishes'.  That is normal.  That is the kind way to treat someone after they have helped you do something.  Or just to acknowledge that they work hard for you.  So that the feel appreciated.  Maybe some don't need that to do things that they see need to be done.  And, it isn't exactly needed.  But isn't it nice when someone recongizes that you spent a little extra time doing something, especially your family?

Manipulation.  *In a high pitch baby voice* 'Luke, thanks for putting the dishes away!  You're so helpful!  Thanks for being such a good helper.  You're so good!!'  Manipulating him into thinking that he's really going to get this special attention every time he does something of my approval.  Something that he's going to expect every time.  It's over done.  It's so over done that he's going to seek that huge approval for everything.  And when he's older and actually treated like another human, he's going to realize that we don't do that any more.  That adults don't talk like that.  That he's going to have to find other ways to seek that kind of attention from me.  I don't want that kind of attention to be used to teach him to what I want him to do. I don't want that used to manipulate him.  

I want him to see a need that the dishes need to be off the table and put away.  Not just doing it for love from his mother.  He can get the love and attention when he needs it.   And most of all I want to treat my son like he's a person, not my slave or a lesser than me.  He's as equally valuable as me.  As my lovely neighbor, Lisa_C, said once, parents aren't the dictators, they are more like leaders.   My goal isn't to have my son put dishes away.  My goal is to enable him to be the person he is meant to be and to help him along the way.

I'm sure I'm going to learn more about this as he grows.  But for now this is what I've learned. 

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Wordless Wednesday- Luke's New Kitchen

(this one is my favorite, his baby butt is so cute)

(the kitchen is from ikea.  we had a gift card with some money left on it, so I used it to buy this.  He loves it)